Chapter Four: The Decision to Leave

Three years had passed since Abboud crossed the border into Turkey, seeking safety and stability far from the horrors of war in Syria. At first, Turkey seemed like a promising place, a refuge for thousands of refugees who fled the inferno. Abboud thought things would be easier here, that he could build a new life for himself, and perhaps save enough to either bring Layla or return to her someday. But reality was harsher than he had imagined.

When Abboud first arrived in Turkey, life was full of challenges, but he remained optimistic. He worked initially in construction and restaurants, willing to take on any job that would bring in enough to survive. In one of the workshops, he worked over 12 hours a day for a meager wage, but he hoped it would be the beginning of a better life.

Layla was always on his mind. He spoke to her whenever he could, and she was the emotional support that helped him persevere. Though life was tough, the thought of saving money and returning to Syria to bring her kept him fighting against exhaustion and despair.

The Deteriorating Situation in Turkey:

But as time went on, things grew worse. Turkey's laws regarding refugees became stricter. The Turkish authorities began imposing new restrictions on the movement of Syrian refugees, even those who were working hard and trying to integrate into society. Racism crept into every corner of his life. At work, he wasn’t given the respect he deserved, and he was often criticized or insulted because of his nationality.

He started to feel resentment everywhere he went. On the streets, he received suspicious and hostile looks from people. At work, he felt like a second-class citizen. His wages were so low that they barely covered his food and rent, and he constantly feared losing his job due to the new restrictions.

One day, while on his way to work, Abboud experienced a racist incident on the bus. A young Turkish man stood beside him, spewing hateful words, talking about "foreigners" who were stealing jobs and living off the backs of the native population. Abboud wasn’t someone who looked for trouble, but he felt humiliated. He sat in the bus without responding, yet inside, he knew this incident was the final straw.

With each passing day, he saw other refugees around him suffer the same fate. Some were fired from their jobs without reason, others faced harassment in the streets or were even arrested. The situation worsened, and the Turkish government tightened its grip on refugees.

The Hard Decision: Leaving for Europe

After three years of struggle and constant pressure, Abboud realized that staying in Turkey was no longer an option. There was no hope of building a stable life here. The growing racism and restrictions made him feel unwelcome. Life in Turkey had become an unbearable burden.

One night, Abboud sat alone in his small room, which he shared with four other refugees. The room was barely big enough for all of them, and the stench of sweat and humidity filled the air. He looked around at the faces of his roommates, who, like him, were trapped between a ruined past and an uncertain future.

Abboud (speaking softly to himself): “I can’t keep living like this. Turkey isn’t a place where I can build my life. Maybe it’s time to take the risk.”

The decision to leave for Europe had always crossed his mind, but he feared the risk. He had heard many terrifying stories about people drowning while trying to cross the sea. Some made it, but many lost their lives attempting to reach the other side.

Economic Pressure and Lost Hope:

Abboud knew that staying in Turkey was no longer an option. The economic pressure was weighing heavily on him, and he found himself having to choose between paying rent or sending a small amount of money to his mother in Syria. Every time he looked at the little money he had saved, he realized that even if he stayed in Turkey for another ten years, he wouldn’t be able to save enough to bring Layla here.

He decided to take the gamble. He knew that the journey to Europe was fraught with danger, but he had no other choice. He had to try, because he realized that staying in Turkey meant watching all his dreams fade away.